Fundamentals for Creating Positive Board Connections

Introduction

A board only succeeds if it is a team. Board members are either connected or separate. Studies show that well connected people experience increased happiness, better health and a longer life.

First, board members easily connect with other board members who offer help in concrete ways. These ways could include pointing them to the correct documents to read or by acting as a mentor. Second, they connect to other board members who offer emotional support such as accepting an apology or focusing on the issue and not the person when something does not go as planned. Third, individuals who value connections keep everything in perspective and refuse to make a mountain out of a molehill. Fourth, they are willing to offer suggestions and are not insulted if the they are not accepted. Finally, they say ‘thank you’ and acknowledge when something is well done. They celebrate the accomplishments of others. How do you know if you are connected? The following checklist will help with this exercise.

1. I feel I am always right
2. I support others
3. I try to make others do things my way
4. I allow people to do things the way they want to do them
5. I think I know best
6. I learn from others and can easily change my mind when I hear all the information.
7. I have trouble listening when I’ve made up my mind on an issue.
8. I really listen to what is said and to the other person’s non-verbal communication
9. I interrupt others when they are talking
10. I am willing to wait until the time is right to have my say.
11. I am easily distracted from the conversation or task at hand.
12. I focus easily and have no trouble meeting targets and fulfilling obligations
13. I find it hard to trust others
14. I trust others to keep their word and fulfill their commitments.
15. I easily threaten others even though I do not start out with that intention
16. I take the time to think about what I am going to say or do and ensure I am taking full responsibility for all of my words and actions.
17. I work from the philosophy that you have to earn my trust
18. I work from a philosophy that you have my trust and it is up to you to keep it or lose it
19. I think that it is appropriate to have power over others
20. I allow others the space to honestly express themselves
21. I like it when things go my way
22. I want all board members to have their say and I want to do what is best for everyone even if it is not what I want for myself.
23. I gravitate to people who seem helpless or powerless
24. I gravitate to people who can challenge me.
25. I find it difficult to accept responsibility for something that has not gone according to the plan
26. I find I work best when I can say that I am sorry and take corrective action to deal with an issue which I may have created.
27. I find it easy to tell little white lies to avoid certain repercussions
28. I want to tell the truth and be respected for doing so.
29. I do not like to show my true feelings
30. I am honest about my feelings
31. I hold grudges
32. I am always ready to forgive.
33. I am a competitive person
34. I avoid competition and focus on cooperation.

If you checked all of the even numbers you are well connected. If you checked the majority of the even numbers you are well on your way to maintaining strong connections and contributing as a strong team member.

If your total of even and odd numbers is the same, you may want to participate in some team-building professional development.

If you checked mostly odd numbered statements, it is imperative to reassess your perspectives and begin to set a plan in motion to change some of your current beliefs and behaviours.